TevezTubby is a bit of a Dipsy

TEVEZTUBBY IS A BIT OF A DIPSY No one likes footballers, that’s for sure.  Bling, roastings, tinted windows – the list of reasons to loathe our heroes goes on and on.  But Carlos TevezTubby has thrown this perception on its head.  The man, who has been linked away from West Ham since the day he […]


To Hull and Back

TO HULL AND BACK As the flood waters rose and then disappeared down the drains again, they left behind a little surprise package in Hull – none other than former Middlesbrough legend, Juninho. “Juninho was very impressed … and it’s obvious that Hull are gearing up to get into the Premier League,” bleated his agent […]

The Bottle of Becks

THE BOTTLE OF BECKS Comedian Rob Newman ridiculed former England manager Graham Taylor in the early ninties by assuming his comical accent and uttering “we mustn’t underestimate the Estonians”.  In response to his own character assassination the funnyman countered that we must underestimate the Estonians: send out slx players, not even wearing the proper kit […]

New characters set for grimy, northern soap opera

NEW CHARACTERS SET FOR GRIMY, NORTHERN SOAP OPERA The long-running soap opera Newcastle United FC may have been ignored once again at the recent British Soap Awards but major storyline twists could see it finally in the shake-up next season.  Gruff northener Big Sam has taken on day-to-day management of the football club while flash […]

It’s Owen Hargreaves, not Jimmy Greaves

IT’S OWEN HARGREAVES, NOT JIMMY GREAVES Manchester United’s highly perceptive fans are renowned the world over for their accurate football analysis.  They have spent much of the last few years rightly denouncing their over-the-hill Premiership-winning manager, writing the club’s eptiaph after the Glazer takeover and correctly predicted that United would win nothing with the likes […]