Category Archives: News

Selling viruses and spineless sackings

“I wouldn’t sell a virus to that mob” – Alex Ferguson on his relationship with Ronaldo-suitors, Real Madrid

Does anyone outside of Glasgow inner-city suburbs know what that even means?  You won’t sell a virus?  Unless it’s in the hands of terrorists a virus is hardly a commodity.

Anti-Virus

“It is spineless, the man who employed him can sack him just as quickly as that” – Portsmouth manager Tony Adams on Blackburn’s decision to sack Paul Ince after 17 games

I’m sure if Tony Adams appointed someone to manage his charity, the Sporting Chance Clinic, and found after four months that they were not doing a good job and didn’t look likely to get their head around the demands, then he too would have to make a business decision.  It’s very easy to be criticial when you’re not the one who stands to lose.  Adams is probably more worried about the fact that two inexperienced managers (Roy Keane of Sunderland and Ince) have left their posts after struggling to get results.

Coincidentally Portsmouth’s only two league wins in two and a half months have been against Sunderland and Blackburn.


Paul Ince Sacked

Incey

That’s so racist.


Beckham is no Kaka

Yes, this is headline news.

Beckham! Again!

I wrote way back in June 1998 about Mr Beckham and the “overratedness” of the then-foetal brand.  I think time has gone on to show him to be the fourth best of the famous Man U midfield quartet behind Keane, Giggs and Scholes (in that order).

In that ten year old column that saw me half-wave a flag for the long-gone Darren Anderton, I said:

“Beckham apparently represents the future of English football. By that I take it they mean he is the British answer to the many worldwide underachieving whining prima donnas that are already in existence. He played in every qualifying game but failed to deliver a single goal or a stand-out performance while Shearer, Ince and even Gascoigne turned out some excellent performances during these games.

This, effectively, is what the Inter Milan director is saying.  Beckham is not and never has been world class.  Listening to nauseating British pundits over the last ten years you’d swear Beckham was Pele and Best rolled in to one.  Of course, deep down, they didn’t mean it.  I mean if Wayne Bridge was to have a half dozen stand out games for Chelsea they’d probably proclaim him “top class” while dismissing foreign full-backs as diving little tykes.  Well you got to give the Sun readership something to hang their xenophobic hats on.


West Ham guilty, rubbish Tottenham and blind refs

As I write this blog in the company cafeteria, a long-haired techie is filling the otherwise-silent ambience with a string of confident babble about some multi-ring network stretching from Dublin to California via Virginia or something like that.  It’s all a bit of an exercise in self-satisfaction. A bit like the way this blog is my own expression of my own self-satisfaction.  But, hey, at least reading it is voluntary.

West Sham

The Carlos Tevez affair was back on the agenda today with an arbitration panel ruling that West Ham were guilty of fielding an ineligible player in the 2006/7 season.  West Ham insisted they alone owned Carlos Tevez but in fact he was co-owned by a company called MSI, a breach of Premier League regulations.

Sheffield United were relegated on the last day after Tevez emerged from seven months of chubby ineffectiveness to score important goals and lift his team from the bottom of the league and to eventual safety.

Sheffield United are claiming about £30m in damages and a seperate panel is to rule on the amount.  Get ready for appeals to beat the band.

Tottenham are shit

They really are.  Another dismal run-out for the Spurs in a 0-0 home draw with Wigan last weekend leaves them with just 2 points from 12 and rooted to the bottom of the league.  Juande Ramos made some positive changes I felt when he moved Gareth Bale to left-midfield and started the snappy Jamie O’Hara in the center.  But with the likes of Pavluychenko and Bentley completely ineffective and Ramos yet to find a winning formula, this could be a long, hard season.

The problem is that I don’t know if he’s going to find it.  The large space between the defence and forwards (known as “the midfield”) is about as useful as Derby County right now.  There’s no shape evident and – whisper it quietly – there are concerns that Ramos does not know how to set up a team in the Premier League.

It beggars belief.

Respect for blind people

The old “where’s your specs, ref?” taunt has been doing the rounds since the early days of football but referee Stuart Atwell must need bi-focals the size of the Hubble if he can’t tell a ball has crossed the line from 18 yards.

The 25 year old rookie has been fast-tracked through the system by the Football League but he was left wanting on Saturday when he awarded Reading a goal at Watford despite the fact the ball was three yards wide of the post.

Watford manager Aidy Boothroyd was sent to the stands for remonstrating and while fully supportive of the “repsect the refs” initiative, it’s moments like this when you feel immense sympathy for managers.

However, I think the saddest part of the episode is that Reading players did not come clean and tell the referee that it wasn’t a goal.  Stephen Hunt said; “We can’t do anything about it. It’s not our mistake, but what can you do? You can’t say ‘no ref, it wasn’t in’. “

Yes, you can.  That’s exactly what the Reading players should have done.  But that’s football for you.  It’s “win at all costs”, an edict pushed on players by managers and directors.  This stance has been backed by both Boothroyd and Reading manager Steve Coppell.

Look at Paolo di Canio in 2000.  The then-West Ham striker chose to catch the ball rather than put it in an empty net when he spotted the opposition goalkeeper, Everton’s Paul Gerrard, lying injured on the ground.  Or how about Liverpool’s Robbie Fowler who in 1997 tried to convince the referee that his dive over Arsenal’s David Seaman was not a penalty.

Referees do need help and some integrity from the players would be a great place to start.


News Ticker Thoughts [21 Apr 2008]

The Premiership Party

Carlos Tevez did an Eric Cantona this weekend: popping up with a vital goal after an undistinguished display a la the Frenchman’s final season in football. The late equaliser at Blackburn could be the goal that will win the title at United. Even if Chelsea beat them 5-0 at Stamford Bridge, two wins in their last two games will secure one of United’s more impressive championships. However…don’t rule out the improving Wigan – who United take on at the JJB on the final day – from making it tense.

The Relegation Race

Fulham and Birmingham occupy the two remaining relegation positions – the two teams I predicted to go down with Derby a few months back. It will be tight though – Birmingham need to beat Fulham to condemn them for sure and then face a last day tug-of-war with Bolton for that remaining slot. At home to Blackburn, who have nothing to play for, it’s possible Birmingham might be able to pull it out of the fire. Bolton will be at Chelsea – who may have to win to win the league.

Champions League

The only reason I watch the Champions league is to watch the English clubs lose so unfortunately I have to pick a favourite between Liverpool and Chelsea this week. Liverpool has been there before so I’d prefer to see Chelsea advance. Also I dislike the way Bentiez has put all his eggs in one basket (again), sacrificing the league to advance in a tournament that is arguably easier to win. I think the first leg at Anfield will be a 1-1 draw. Meanwhile, Man United may not have the outstanding individual talent that Barcelona does but with the Spaniards unable to buy a win recently the English Champions-elect are slight favourites. I think they’ll win 1-0 at the Nou Camp.

Gareth Barry

If it’s true that Liverpool want Gareth Barry, Rafa Benitez will never learn. You can file Barry alongside Benayoun, Bellamy, Zenden and Pennant: decent Premiership players who are not going to distinguish themselves at the “business end” of the season. The problem for the likes of Martin O’Neill at Villa is that Barry is a semi-international who is 27 years of age and unlikely to command a huge fee despite being the heartbeat of his current club. It’s a similar situation to what faced West Ham last summer who ended up only getting £5m for Benayoun despite his importance to the club – he has started 14 league games for Liverpool this season.

Lita back at Reading

I like Leroy Lita and was surprised he struggled to make his mark this season with Reading. They loaned him to Charlton but have now recalled him for their three remaining critical Premiership games. I predict that Lita will play a part in keeping Reading up.

Man City v Portsmouth

An entertaining clash won 3-1 by City. A few points from the game.

1) David James: This guy is a clown. Yes, he makes some wonderful saves but you can bank on him fluffing something in every game. This time he got stranded outside his area and Portsmouth directly conceded from his behaviour. That he’s on the shortlist for Player’s Player of the Year is a farce.

2) Darius Vassell: Always liked this guy and he’s in really good form for City at the moment – Eriksson has been a positive influence on his career.

3) Benjani: He might not score much but Benjani looks to be a model professional – great attitude, works his socks off, skilful. One of my favourite players to watch.

4) Manager’s myopia: After Manchester City’s impressive substitute, Sam Williamson, was yellow carded for a late challenge in the 65th minute, Portsmouth’s management team of Joe Jordan and Harry Redknapp were absolutely incensed, gesturing angrily to anyone who would give them attention on the sideline. Presumably they thought Williamson should have been sent off.

When Portsmouth right-back Lauren was carded for a far worse scissors-tackle on the same player five minutes later, they seemed less animated – as were the Manchester City coaching staff who didn’t run around moaning for the sake of it. Some people may scoff at Sven-Goran Eriksson but at least – with the exception of Faria Alam – he conducts himself with dignity. Redknapp is a wagon.


EPL Review [02 Mar 2008]

Champions league chase

Even though the media like to paint the chase for the Champions League spot as an open battle between three teams, in reality Liverpool are likely to predictably claim it. The reason? Benitez has finally started playing his key players in league games. Reina, Carragher, Gerrard, Alonso, Mascherano and Torres all started and they were too strong for relegation-haunted Bolton.

While we’re on that subject, Fulham underlined their relegation credentials with an impotent display at home to Man U. United – without Ronaldo and Rooney – cruised to a 3-0 win at Craven Cottage leaving Roy Hodgson’s men favourites for the drop with Derby County. It’s a shame to see a decent club like Fulham slide towards the Championship. People will point the finger at the sacking of Lawrie Sanchez but – and I’ve covered this before – it’s mainly that his signings are not up to the standard of the ones who left which is the reason they are in this mess.

Arsenal’s championship aspirations took a knock and it could have been worse, Nicklas Bendtner’s last minute equaliser against Aston Villa made it just 2 points out of 6 for Wenger’s men and serious questions are now being asked about whether this young squad have the mettle in them – and the man-power – to hang on. No van Persie, no Eduardo, no Rosicky, no Eboue, no Touré – and it’s starting to take it’s toll.

The introduction of Andrew Johnson helped Everton overcome Portsmouth and give them a second crucial win in six days. Yakubu – even at 11m – may be one of the signings of the season. I was miffed when Spurs showed no interest in him and went for Darren Bent instead. He’s proven himself to be an effective player when in the zone and David Moyes has done a great job in building him up and improving him as the season has gone on. When Spurs won at Goodison Park towards the end of last season Moyes was getting booed by his own fans so it’s been some turnaround there.

At the bottom

Birmingham gave themselves a boost by hammering Spurs 4-1. Despite resting several players and not having their first choice center-back pairing available Spurs should still have been in with a shout and it’s a poor indictment of the state of mind of these supposed professionals who were pictured stumbling out of nightclubs earlier in the week following their Carling Cup victory. Juande Ramos has no doubt made up his mind about Paul Robinson who was culpable for two of the goals, and is probably looking with disdain in the direction of Pascal Chimbonda and Darren Bent. Personally I’m not that bothered about the League Cup and would prefer to qualify for Europe through the league but beggars can’t be choosing and the abysmal start under Martin Jol has ensured that Ramos has no hope of making the top six this season.

Elsewhere it was disaster for Kevin Keegan as Newcastle lost to a last minute Matt Derbyshire goal for Blackburn at St James Park. I don’t think Newcastle will go down but it’ll be a close run thing as this was a huge opportunity lost at home to an indifferent Blackburn team. He really needs the senior members of his squad to stand up and be counted now but anything they do achieve will be undermined by the weak links in defence and midfield. Nicky Butt was named the 2002 World Cup Player of the Tournament you know. Ok, by Pele. Who is mad.

Reading plucked a last minute win too at the expense of Middlesbrough, officially the most non-descript side in the Premiership. No wonder crowds are dipping there: nothing says mid-table more than the Boro. But for Reading it was a crucial win and they hope it will be the result that stops the rot. If Steve Coppell keeps them up I think he shouild pack it in. He’s not going to be able to compete much above a relegation struggle in the next few seasons and is on a bit of a hiding to nothing at the Madejski.

Man City and Wigan played out a dire 0-0 at The City of Manchester Stadium. Eriksson’s men are struggling with form: Elano has been dismal since his return from injury, Stephen Ireland – full of industry that he is – seems a step off the pace, and Martin Petrov plays when he’s in the mood. I’m not sad that Spurs missed out on him. It doesn’t look like it will be an inspiring run-in for the blue half of Manchester.

Other news: Teddy to retire

Teddy SheringhamTeddy Sheringham announced his retirement this weekend and will hang up his boots at the end of the season, aged 42. Tottenham fans idolised Teddy during his first spell from 1992-1997 and were often defending him from criticism when he was selected for England. Funnily enough he came in to his own in an England shirt at Euro 96 where he proved the doubters wrong. He then – of course – became a Judas when he joined Man U in 1997. My immature view was that it was a stab in the back for me personally given my staunch ABU view, consolidated by Gary Bailey’s save from Gordon Smith when he sat on the ball and denied Brighton a romantic 1983 FA Cup final upset (I was ABU long before they were any good!).

But Teddy returned to White Hart Lane after a successful spell at Old Trafford and did ok for a season before moving on again in 2003 to continue his career with Portsmouth, West Ham and finally Colchester. Well done, Teddy. And of course we’ll all remember the Dentist’s Chair fondly…


The Wednesday Newsround [13 Feb 2008]!

I was on the tread for 30 minutes this morning, Sky Sports News ticker on the screen in front of me displaying some amazing BREAKING NEWS: Didi Hamann has signed a one year extension at Manchester City. Seriously, non stop for 30 minutes and beyond, that was the most exciting thing that happened in world football.

I did predict the sacking of Bryan Robson this week but with his Sheffield United side earning a hard earned point at high-flying West Brom last night, Robson earned himself a stay of execution. After meeting the board it was announced that there would be “reasoned changes to the football infrastructure”. Is Venables coming in to bail him out again after being surprisingly ignored for the Irish job?

And on that subject, how did the maligned FAI chief John Delaney manage to secure the ageing but perceptive Giovanni Trapattoni for the top job in Ireland? Even though he’s clearly looking forward to a big pay day before he puts his feet up, the lure of trying to topple Italy in the 2010 World Cup qualifying group should be motivation enough. From Gennaro Gattuso to Darron Gibson – yikes!

A quite brilliant story: Roy Keane’s best friend in the whole world, and ghost writer of his autobiography, Eamon Dunphy, has criticised Keane for becoming “rent-a-quote”. Dunphy, who has staged several spirited and brazen defences of Keane on live TV, accused his friend of being sucked in to the Premier League’s “vacuousness” and said he is frequently “bull-shitting”. I had the same thought myself when Keane started going on about Terry Venables and David O’Leary as being ideal candidates for the Irish job and his recent suggestion that playing Premier League games abroad was a good idea was clearly the last straw. Hopefully Keane will return to being an obtuse arsehole again soon, just like Dunphy consistently is.

And in “the news no one cares about” section, Angola manager Luis Oliveira Gonzales’ has extended his contract until 2010. Or built an extension that cost £2010. I’m not sure.


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